I was 16 years old when I started IV heroin use. I had a "as-normal-as-it-is-in-these-days" childhood growing up, but had always been using hard drugs since 13. Nothing really "stuck" with me until I tried heroin. It started because of peer-pressure in a way. I was with three of my friends when they all were shooting and asked if I wanted to. I felt like if I said no I'd be the 'boring' one. I was shaking when they shot me up. I remember after doing it the first time I thought "why does ANYONE enjoy this?" but the addict mind works as it does, and I soon became hooked. A boy that was friends with me brought me painkillers for a year straight, my addiction switched over to those. I remember when I met my soon-to-be drug partner "boyfriend". He had straight a's, had graduated, ect. I was the 'bad influence' but another year went by and he was also hooked. My life started to spiral out of control. I was stealing from my mom CONSTANTLY, lying, doing anything just to not be sick. My life soon became nothing but just an endless cycle. My lowest point was 3 years into my addiction, I had found a safe in my mom's room with 4,000 dollars in cash. I stole all of it. I was sent to rehab instead of jail, and I stayed there for 28 days, and came out clean. We decided I needed to move (this is NOT a good idea to do straight out of rehab as I soon learned). They moved me into a hotel room until I could find a job/apartment. I soon began using again. By this point i was 19 years old. My parents found out I was using and came and took my car, and left me. I was homeless, alone, and dope-sick. I stayed this way for 2 weeks.

 

I came home again and decided, that was it. This was the end of it. I was going to beat this. So I locked myself in a room and detoxed off pills. (I was taking 10 dilaudids a day). I detoxed off in two weeks and felt somewhat normal. After that I decided I needed to be on suboxone matienence to physically stop myself from being able to feel getting 'high'.

Its been a year and a half since that day now, and I'm a year and a half clean. My life has changed DRASTICALLY. I now have a full time job, and am moving into my first apartment with my wonderful boyfriend who is also sober. 

There is always hope. It doesn't matter if you're 50 or 15, or how long you've been actively addicted, you CAN get clean. Never, ever give up on the idea of someday living a sober life, because it's obtainable. I can't tell you how many times I thought I'd never be anything but a junkie. That I'd never make it to be 25. That I'd never be happy off of drugs. I am everything I ever thought I'd never be, and all of those things are great. 

If you are actively addicted to drugs and want help, SEEK IT.