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My Prayer Was Answered

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My Prayer Was Answered

I was 12 years old when I began using drugs and continued to use until the age of 34. There were periods of sobriety but they never lasted long. I did things that I am still to this day haunted by. There were times when I left my children and my husband for days, weeks, and at the end months. In 2007 I was arrested for misdemeanor drug possession and put on probation. For awhile, I was okay, staying sober and trying desperately to maintain a normal life and be the mother my children needed me to be. But unfortunately that wasn't enough. I began using again despite the fact that I had to take weekly drug tests. For awhile, I managed to time it so I could pass the tests, until I began using methamphetamine. The next thing I knew, I was injecting it up to 12 times a day sometimes more. I abandoned my family and slowly slipped into a private hell. Into a hole so deep that I was simply waiting to be buried in. I began forging checks, printing them and passing them to banks and any other place that would cash them to support my habit. I saw no way out and my only wish was to die to escape the hell I had created for myself. I vividly remember the last time I stuck a needle in my arm. As I was doing it, I prayed harder than I have ever prayed in my life for God to just take me. I couldn't take it anymore. I desperately hoped that He would answer my prayer even though He had no reason to, for I had turned my back on Him long ago. Well He did answer my prayer, just not in the way I had expected. Due to my crimes of forgery, the police had issued a warrant for my arrest and sure enough, not 2 hours later, I was in the back of a police car. I spent 9 months in prison, and during that time God was with me. My relationship with Him grew during that time and when I was released from prison, I was a completely different person. He took that desire for drugs from me. I firmly believe that. I was arrested on January 5, 2009 and since then I have not the desire for drugs or alcohol. I now have become the mother my children need, and the wife I was meant to be. I still struggle sometimes with the memories of the things I did to my family even though they have forgiven me, I still have yet to forgive myself, but I'm working on it. Even when things seem hopeless, they are not. I pray that everyone struggling with addiction finds their way home.


This Story of Hope was created in celebration of recovery and to let families know that there are pathways to hope and healing. The Partnership for Drug-Free Kids is the only nonprofit organization dedicated to helping families who are struggling with their son or daughter's substance use. Please consider sharing this page so that families know where to turn to for help, and that there is always hope.

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Comments

1. Julie
Thank you for sharing your story and congratulations on your recovery!
2. Julie
Thank you for sharing your story, Thomas. Congrats to you on your recovery. All the best to you!
3. Julie
Thank you for sharing your story and congratulations on your recovery!