Never ending story
Where do i start. I guess I'll go back as far as possible. I grew up with my step dad and my beautiful mom and 2 sisters. My real father ditched me and my ?older sis faster than quick. My life was filled with BBQ''s and BEER. GOOD TIMES. Atleast for a lil wile. My Dad was a good Dad there for a lil while and then, well, he got into smokng weed. To me, that was normal. Then cocaine, then heroine. My mother, well, shes always been an alcoholic. We grow up and move on..my sisters and I started drinking at a very early age. I was 14 to be exact. My lil sister started smoking weed and doing mushrooms at 11. My older sister never really got into the drug scene as much as my lil sister and I. She''s just an alcoholic. But my lil sister and I have done every drug under the sun. Cocaine was my drug of choice. My baby sister's~crack. Still is. I let go of cocaine 5 yrs ago. No treatment. No program. just quit. Still drinking though. I admitted myself to a rehab once bc I was getting pretty bad. Only to have heroine given to me in there . I left. I moved on to prescription pain pills for a while. I was taking like 20 a day. I slowed that down. I take one or two whenever i get my hands on them. I dont pay for them off the street anymore though. Now, I'm 15 days sober and..uhhh. it sucks. The reason I am trying is for my son. I ?am looking for help with AA meetings and having no luck., I have no car. I havent looked into any rehabs either. My sons are all grown up. Except for my youngest. Who is gonna be 17 this month. He is addicted to marajuana. Alot of people dont take that seriously, but I do. He has stolen my rent money, sold his shoes, stolen from me and my friends and family. He broke into someones house and vehicle. He is detained in a facility for juveniles at the moment. This is his 5th time. I have 4 sons total...and out of the 4~3 are addicts. Im 38 yrs old...and I dont know how to quit. All i know, is that I want to do this not only for me, but for my sons. Some people can drink casually and in moderation. That's not me. And my son is the same way. I look at them and I dont ask "WHERE DID I GO WRONG?" I know.?
My son is currently awaiting placement in a drug rehab facility. but because of his medical insurance, they are having problems. I just want him to get help. I want to get help. I want to be sober. It scares me. I am surrounded by addicts. My sisters, brothers,friends, neighbors and my own children. I want to run...far far far away. But even then..it will find me.
This Story of Hope was created in celebration of recovery and to let families know that there are pathways to hope and healing. The Partnership for Drug-Free Kids is the only nonprofit organization dedicated to helping families who are struggling with their son or daughter's substance use. Please consider sharing this page so that families know where to turn to for help, and that there is always hope.