My name is Kevan, I am 19 years old.?I have 42 days clean and sober today. The journey I have begun has been the hardest thing I have ever had to do my entire life, but it has brought me true joy and gratitude for life. I have a higher power who I choose to call God who I pray to at least twice a day. The first thing I do when I wake up is kneel beside my bed and ask my higher power to keep me clean and sober just for today. At night I kneel down next to my bed and thank him for keeping me clean, and doing the next right thing. If I am having a bad day I pray multiple times throughout the day for patience and I let God take control. I am young, I started using when I was 15, my addiction immeditly progressed to more harmful drugs. Before I knew it I was doing things I promised myself I would never do. I thought I was cool. If it's cool to put my life and others in jeperody because of stupid choices I made under the influnce of drugs and or alcohol, if it's cool to push my loved ones away to the point they ignore my phone calls, if it's cool to steal and lie from loved ones to get high, if its cool to become severley depressed and think of killing myself, then I guess I was cool. Today none of that is cool to me, matter of fact I despise of people who think that way. I have realized that my life consits of a lot more today than drinking and drugging. I remember thinking everyone at leasts smokes marijuana and has a beer or two every once in a while, today I don't associate myself with people who use any mind altering substances. I surrond myself with people who are clean and sober and who are doing the right thing. This journey I chose to begin 42 days ago, has been a blessing. I am so glad I realized I was killing myself slowly not only physcially but mentally as well as emotionally. I am 19, I have my ENTIRE life ahead of me, I know that if I never use again, I will die knowing I lived the life I have always dreamed of. If you are struggling in any way with the disease of addiction or alcoholism-- reach out for help, you don't have to suffer alone, and if you reach out for help, you won't have to suffer anymore.?