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Clinical Depression and Pills

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Clinical Depression and Pills

So my story would start from when I was 4; but I'm going to skip all my drama, an skip down to the week before my birthday this year. I am 17 now and it is after Thanksgiving 2012. My birthday is April 25th. I was dating a guy for about a month named Charles. He was constantly grabbing and yanking me, and forcing me to sit. I couldn't hang with certain friends of mine because he didnt like them, he wa obsessed with me. Ran away from home thinking he could live with me in a house that was tiny and full already and I was sharing a room with my mom. I dumped him the week before 4/20. I finally took him back 4-18-12. He knew I was popping pills. I was trying all kinds of stuff. I remembered watching Dr. Phil when I was little and seeing one of my ADHD pills can get me high. So on 4-29-12 my school had what they called flex days. If you had a good attendance record and passed your state tests you could skip that Friday well I had to go to school. So I took my regular psychiatric meds for my depression, a vivarin to keep me awake, and 6 adderall 30 mg XR. I realized oh shit, you're not supposed to take vivarin with adderall. I felt stupid. I ran to the bus stop and got on the bus. I say with my best friend and started to get a headache. I got to school told Charles. We went up to the nurse she gave me an ice pack. The school bell ran and I had a teacher I did not like. I sat next to my best friend and my head was starting to feel bigger and bigger. I started to squeeze my head and cry Hollie asked me "Bri' are you okay? You're face is turning colors?" I said no. I told her what I took. This teacher I always make an excuse to get out of class to go to the nurse. Hollie had convinced me to ask her and the teacher had actually recognized I didn't look good. I go to the nurse and she's in the police officers' office and I know the school officer and well she knows me pretty well. I said I don't feel good she said "You know your Mom won't come and pick you up, she's at work." I walk out, then walk back in the office. I get on my knees and start crying and I said "I can't fucking stand the pain! IT HURTS!" She takes me to the office, she checks my temperature it's normal. Then I lay down she checks my bloo pressure it was 200/102. She said that can't be right. She gets another it's the same. She calls the school officer over there. The school officer has my mom in the phone and my mom was yelling "what did you take?" I said my meds. I didn't want a ticket. She got me to talk; I said a vivarin and a adderall. My mom knows it was a lie. She asked how much adderall- I said one to concentrate in school. She said bullshit. The nurse had to use two more different blood pressure machines and they came out the same. Finally school officer said should I call the ambulance she said yes. The nurse came and sat by me and tried a different approach, she said "Bri, it's important that we know what you took so we can get you help when they get ambulance gets here." I said "Fine! I took 6 adderall 30 mg XR." She told the school officer. The ambulance arrived with the stretcher and it got a little blurry from there. I remember seeing all the teachers in the main office watching me, as I'm on the stretcher. Everybody knows my name in the district from pre-k to seniors. I was embarrassed. I remember the school officer trying to follow. She's a family friend, they say she couldn't follow. I remember on the ambulance ride, holding my head and screaming and it got so much more worse. The lady asking me questions. I turned over an told her to leave me alone. We arrived to the closest hospital and I remember blacking out I woke up and saw my mom. My head still hurt I called for my mom, then nurses came in and asked me questions, I blacked out for good. According to my mom, I started to have a seizure, I remember when I was awake I had a hole where my lip is supposed to be I bit it off on the right side where a snake bit is supposed to go. I had those staring seizures and was biting my lip off, my mom was trying to talk to me and she was telling me to stop biting my lip and I wasn't listening she called the nurses, and then I went into a cardiac arrest. From there my mom refuses to tell me what happened as everyone tells me it's something a mother never wants to see her child go through. She refuses to tell me and she won't ever tell me she says. Nobody is allowed to tell me in the family. I remember waking up at 12:00 pm exactly and The school officer was sitting on the left side of my bed my mom on the left aunt and uncle by the school officer and my grandpa by my mom. I didn't know who anybody was except the school officer. Not even my mom. I told the school officer- I said "Officer Wedel* she asked me "What?" I said randomly "I love you!" She said "I love you too kiddo." I fell asleep again. I had amnesia. I didn't recognize my own mother. I was confused. I was told I drank the charcoal in less than 30 seconds. I was thirsty. I was transferred to another hospital. My mom rode with me. I was asleep, I woke up, I looked at my mom, I never throw up and when I do it's those exorcists ones. I threw up all over the back of the ambulance, me and my mom who was sitting on the side chair of the ambulance. That window I could not see out of. I got to the other hospital I remember them poking needles all in my arms. It took me a while for my aunt and my mom to get me to remember who they were. I stayed the night in the hospital. They asked me why I took the pills. I didn't have a clue or remember why and I still don't I think it was a mixture of wanting to die and get high. They transferred me to mental institution in Desoto, then Mansfield, then went to residential in San Marcos, they mentally abused me yelled and all that. So I went to Meridell Achievement Center. My friend was there too, from where I live. I wasn't allowed to talk to him. I got the help I needed. I'm not depressed, or doing drugs. I feel better. I feel like I can be myself, I feel more comfortable. I have my life together. I'm ready for the real world. People think I'm not but I do have plans. I am going through with them. I i don't care what it takes.

This Story of Hope was created in celebration of recovery and to let families know that there are pathways to hope and healing. The Partnership for Drug-Free Kids is the only nonprofit organization dedicated to helping families who are struggling with their son or daughter's substance use. Please consider sharing this page so that families know where to turn to for help, and that there is always hope.

Guest Book


1. Bri'
Okay I was half asleep when I put my story on here I tried resubmitting it wouldn't accept. Too similar, I guess spam. Yeah I had an all niter couldn't sleep. I re-read this the date is 4/20/12, not 4/29/12. ._. Worst, but best day of my life the day I choose to change. I do have it saved the edited version and rewrote in my notes. I put as little details as possible in this, the version I send to friends I copy and paste it'a full details. If anybody knows of any other websites or drug free that I can post and get my word out let me know! Please? Follow me on Twitter and Instagram, my username is crunkkiddo, I follow back. I constantly am updating pictures and tweets, I have nothing else to do! HMU!