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Walking In the Light

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I'm a Jewish Mexican-American.That makes me different from most or all of the other people on these pages. I am also a recovering addict, which makes me exactly the same as the rest of us.

We are addicts of different ages, races and sizes, gay and straight, survivors of slavery to many different drugs and combinations of drugs, including alcohol, among the most lethal and demoralizing of them all. What we have in common, in our millions, is the experience of living in spiritual darkness, of feeling separate from and unworthy of our families, from the entire human race and from the Higher Power that created us, too.

I was brought up by middle-class people who didn't drink or even smoke tobacco. I had grandmothers but no grandfathers. It wasn't until I was an adult that I was?told that both my grandfathers had been abusive?alcohol addicts that beat my grandmothers and terrorized my parents as children. It's no wonder that when I first discovered the "liquid drug," at age 9, my parents did not yell, they cried.

That first intoxication led me, over the years,?to every other drug I could put my hands on. My father passed away without knowing that I went to the depths of IV drug use, with cocaine, heroin and, especially, methamphetamine.

My mother lived to see me get clean, with the help of an anonymous?12-step fellowship, and I was able to care for her for the last 12 years of her life. I was at her side, along with my son and my daughter, when she passed last summer, and I know that the best gift I ever gave her was my recovery.

Because I have found my way back into the Light,?I have stopped being self-destructive and destructive in general. The God that I serve has given me a chance to live the life of a decent man and help others. I have?cowered in the darkness, a deep, black hole where I was spiritually dead and physically killing myself. Today, I choose to walk in the Light. It was other addicts, motivated by the same God, that showed me the way. I will always be grateful to the men and women who cared enough to tell me that I was worthy of life.


This Story of Hope was created in celebration of recovery and to let families know that there are pathways to hope and healing. The Partnership for Drug-Free Kids is the only nonprofit organization dedicated to helping families who are struggling with their son or daughter's substance use. Please consider sharing this page so that families know where to turn to for help, and that there is always hope.

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Comments

1. Cristina
maybe we have to do or prove first that were willing to change...and also that action is louder than words....and its true that when you already lost someone trust its not easy to give it again....
2. Patsy Stair
The truth has come out about Ted Williams. He was on Dr. Phil for 2 days--he is still drinking and admitted it. He appears to be manic depressive. He admitted to Dr. Phil that he is a con man and is/was proud of it. He has agreed to go to rehab--paid for by Dr. Phil. Apparently, he is surrounded by "handlers" who are influencing him--maybe not in a good way. This is a sad story all around, but he has been offered help. Let's hope he takes it and that this truly becomes a rags to riches story.
3. Denise Krochta
I've been reading comments on different websites and it is making me crazy. There is a lot of bad energy focused on this man's mom. I think all of us loved ones can identify with her cautious optimism. When he said he called her and tried to tell her he was going to get a job and do some good things and she didn't want to hear about it. Those who "don't know" are criticizing her lack of trust. It takes time to regain this trust. Many of us know that this good fortune isn't necessarily the panacea that everyone thinks it will be. It is up to this guy and no one else. I love this mom!
4. Mary
Thank you for sharing your very interesting story.