It’s really hard to put my emotions into words. Especially when you’re feeling 10 different emotions all at once and you don’t really know how to put them together for it to make sense to anybody else.
I can’t believe it’s been a year since teddy’s mother has passed away. Some days It feels like it’s been way longer and some days it feels like it happened just yesterday. Some days I am so angry that all I can do is cry, thinking of her children and how they are struggling with out her. And other days I look at my baby brother and know that even through everything, he is happy and he is loved. We wish that things could be so different, but unfortunately we cannot choose peoples paths in life. And as much as I wish I could, I cannot change what happened. But I know she’s is watching all of her babies from afar.
I want to do something for my baby brother and his other siblings. I want to contribute to help this opioid addiction because unfortunately it is so present in our society. I want to help spread awareness that this is a problem. And people should NOT be ashamed to ask for help. We all struggle with our own demons, but you DESERVE help. You DESERVE to find recovery.
If you’re struggling with addiction, please get help. There are people in this world that need you. Your kids need you. I know of too many little children growing up without their biggest role models and people they need most. It the saddest thing I’ve ever had to witness. Teddy is small and doesn’t quite understand what it means when we say mommy’s in heaven. And it breaks my heart every damn day knowing one day he will ask every question that I don’t want to answer. All he needs to know for now is that he is loved beyond measure.
My hope is that one day children will have a lifetime with their parents instead of losing them at a young age. My hope is that one day, people will truly live their life, if not for themselves, for their children. After all, they are our future and they only learn from our doings. So let’s do good. Let’s do better.
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