Anyone who didn't know him wouldn't think twice; he had a stoner aura. He dressed sloppily, let his hair grow long, always had some kind of cigarette between his fingers, and he could be seen skateboarding through the neighborhood during school hours. That's what other people saw. But people who knew Sebastian saw him as a person who didn't expect other people to fill a mold; he didn't pressure anyone, never fought, never bothered to point out when someone was wrong. He was someone who you could talk to and he'd listen...just being around him was like a free therapy session.He was a mess on the outside, but he was a cool, quiet, calm, caring person on the inside. Then, when we were both 12, he offered to try smoking some of his father's cigarettes with me. I took him up on that. We smoked them up by the park, in his favorite gazebo...and that started everything. I smoked casually after that, but he abused whatever unhealthy substance he could get his hands on. He told me that it was an escape; a way to forget life, forget everything that bothered him. Something to focus on, I guess. We grew up together, and he continued abusing anything he could. He'd skip gym class and abuse creatine to make up for it. Eventually, he began looting cars to pay for his narcotics addiction. I watched him and wondered what in the world could turn my best friend into a thief. I never knew exactly what he was abusing besides tobacco and creatine, but there had to be more, because he was high quite a lot. I was shattered when I watched him sink lower and lower into the pool of depression and drugs. Through his relatively short lifespan, he remained a friend and brother, but the day came when he didn't answer his phone, didn't wake up when I knocked on his door, and he didn't respond when his dad kicked the door open. They found what they called a "suicide cocktail" of meth, heroin, cocaine, and just about any other drug you could name sitting in his bloodstream. I wouldn't be surprised if he did this on purpose; he was depressed often, and often talked about his anger at God and the whole world. The only thing I wish I knew is what he would've been like if it weren't for the substance abuse.He was a friend. Nothing will ever change that.
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