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My downfall with addiction

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My downfall with addiction

I was born and raised in Baltimore Maryland. What many people call the" Devil's Playground". When i was 10 i started smoking cigarettes. When I was 11 or 12 I tried alcohol and marijuana for the first time. At that time I thought it was the "COOL" thing to do because everyone else was doing it. I continued with using just?those drugs up until i graduated high school which i barely graduated because of going to school high every day. After I graduated I was only 17. I started dating my sons father who was a well known drug dealer. While with him he introduced me to Acid, Ecstasy, prescription pills like percocets, oxycotin, xanax n so on. I Immediately became hooked on the downers/opiates. When I was 19 I got pregnant with my son. Now my family didn't know I was using any type of drugs and i was scared to tell them, or my Dr. that I was addicted. Why didn't the?Dr. test me for drugs when i first went to my OB-GYN appt. I still wonder that but i stopped all the drugs cold turkey and from the withdraws my hormone levels weren't rising like they were suppose to when your pregnant and the?Dr. told me?I had a 75% chance of having a miscarriage due to that. My pride got in the way is how i see it now. After about 2 weeks everything leveled out and the rest of my pregnancy went great and my son was a healthy baby. Thank the good Lord. Now here is where my life got even worse. When my son was 1 1/2 i started using oxycotin again and it started?to be?too expensive?for me. I was 21 then. So i ran into a friend and they told me what i was paying for the pills i could get double in herion so i did that and instantaneously i was hooked n i knew i could afford it. little did i know i was ruining my life. i began stealing from my family n my parents and a friend of my moms saw me using it in a ally n went n told my mom. when i got home? she had my son. thats 1 thing i can say i never took my son 2 go get drugs or have him around when i was using them n, i always made sure he had what he needed 4 the whole month. not many mothers can say they did that but i did. when my mother told my father they told me go get help or get out. so i went to a out patient detox m got clean 4 around 2 weeks?n started using again so again another detox. and that cycle kept going until i was in every rehab n detox in Baltimore. After all that I was scared the system would take my son so i signed temporary custody of my son over to my parents n then my dad told me he wasn't gonna watch me slowly kill myself so i left. 2 get money i ended up robbing cars with my using friends, going into houses that were being remodeled m stealing the expensive sinks, tubs that had hot tubs in them n whatever else we could get outta them n sell them to the dealers for drugs. Doing that wasn't enough 2 support my habit being that we had 2 split all the money n drugs we got so i started prosituting just 2 support my herion n now cocaine habit. This went on for a few yrs. In Nov 2005 a old friend came to me. He told me he moved away from Baltimore n got clean. He then asked me a question that would change my life. he asked if i really wanted to get clean n move to Western Maryland with him. We been friends since childhood. I told him yes. He had 2 go home n told me he would b back 2 get me in 2 weeks. Truthfully i didn't think he was gonna come but 2 weeks later he came back with a bus ticket 4 me. We went 2 my parents n told them n i gave my son a kiss n hug. On Nov 20th 05, i got on that bus n moved with him with just the clothes on my back n he assured me all would be alright. and it was. I went into the hospital here where they properly detoxed me and helped me with my mental health issues. I started getting home sick a few months later n left n went back to Baltimore and began 2 use again. The 2nd day in Baltimore I ended up overdosing n the people who were with me at that time did take me to the hospital, sat me into a wheelchair rolled me very hard into the hospital n yelled to the security guards "she overdosed" n got back into the car n left. this is what the security ladies told me when i finally came to. My mom came up?n i told her to call my friend n ask him if he would let me come back up n he did so a few days later i got back on the bus n came back to Western Maryland. Now this time i stayed but i can't say i stayed clean the whole time since i came back up here in 2006. I had a few relapses n he did too. In 2007 i got on a Methadone Program which helped me get off the herion. Now some people look at methadone as a drug still but if taken as prescribed it does help. Like a?Dr. told me. addicts need methadone like heart patients need heart medicine. Now its 2013 n me n my new fiance have been clean for over 6 yrs n were off the methadone and all drugs. My family has forgiven me for all I've put them through. I still see a counselor cause i still have problems getting over all i did when i was using. My fiance tells me all the time that something told him to come to me n help me. And he always tells me "not only did i help save u but u helped save me at the same time" i never thought i would be where i am right now.?I got my own place, my son with me who is now 11 n yes, a very clean bill of health. After getting clean i got tested for over 2 yrs straight for all Diseases n every test came back negative. So i know now that GOD was really on my side. Not many people can say they have been where i have been, did what i did and come out on the other side clean n sober without any Diseases or std's or anything that u can possibly catch with the life i was living.?I was sleeping in abandoned houses or shacks next to train tracks. If only i knew what i was doing when i was 11. If only i knew that what i thought was "cool" would lead me down a long road of Destruction. IF ONLY........ I missed a lot of time with my son that i can never get back. I am glad that he was to young to remember anything i did but i still get scared cause what i didn't know back then is that addiction is Hereditary. And a lot of my family are alcoholics and some r drug addicts. Sometimes i think if i would of never got with my sons father i would of never of touched any of them drugs, but i can't put the blame on no one but me. He may of introduced me to them but he didn't force me to do them. I know my experience with addiction has made me a more stronger, wiser, n better person. I've learned a lot throughout them years. And i know i can use my experience and educate my son on addiction and educate others also.?I always tell people who say i will never use drugs and i will never put a needle in me or i will never get that bad and i tell them to "NEVER SAY NEVER" because I was once one of them people who said the same exact lines n i never thought i would do all the things i did, but i did them n i can't change that. All i can do is use my experience n learn from it n help others who i see r going down the same path i was once on. I've been clean for about 6yrs now. Me and my fiance. I look at him as my guardian angel because if it weren't for him asking me if i wanted to get clean i would most likely be in prison, have a deadly n incureable disease or i would be dead. So I thank GOD everyday for bringing him into my life. If i had to tell the young kids one thing, its? don't do anything cause u see others doing it ,or if ?u think its the cool thing to do cause in the end them people u call your friends won't be there for u. Be smart and just stay away from them people because they aren't your real friends if they are trying to get u to do drugs or drink alcohol, even if they stop talking to u because u turned it down, their doing u a favor because 10yrs from now u will be doing good for yourself while u see them still using and getting high with no life. So please use my story as a example that what u see your friends doing ain't cool and will end up destroying your life. May GOD be with everyone still struggling with their addiction. Hope all has a blessed day


This Story of Hope was created in celebration of recovery and to let families know that there are pathways to hope and healing. The Partnership for Drug-Free Kids is the only nonprofit organization dedicated to helping families who are struggling with their son or daughter's substance use. Please consider sharing this page so that families know where to turn to for help, and that there is always hope.

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1. Used Cars Dallas
It's definitely important for parents to set good examples when it comes to safe driving behaviors since their kids will drive eventually. I'm sure they will be influenced by how their parents drove.
2. Cheryl
Hi this is Cheryl n this is my story. i am correcting the year i moved to western Maryland to get clean. i accidentally put November 2005 when it was November 2004. I am still doing good clean and sober. Hope everyone enjoys my story n uses it as a learning guide. I've had a long hard life with needles, heroin, prositution and everything else that comes with drug addiction but i know if i can do it after all that I've been through then you can too. May GOD lead u down the correct road of sobriety. GOD bless n to all that's clean, CONGRATULATIONS!!!! And to the people who r still struggling, don't lose hope or your faith. Know that u have the strength to get clean and sober but u r the only one that can help u. Take that first step in recovery. TRUST WHEN I SAY IT IS WELL WORTH IT. Have a blessed day